Hey old boy...did you bring the Viagra with you? ;o), LOL,<grin>, rofl. I envy Fargo's returning back to school and moving to Virginia Beach. There's nothing like taking a sweet, young coed under your wing and showing her the ways of the world! Maybe A Nude Cornucopia's peek patrol can someday do a feature on Old Dominion Cuties.
I see that Fargo has been telling some war stories. This just came in off the wire that the Pentagon recently found it had too many generals and offered an early retirement bonus. They promised any general who retired straight away his full annual benefits plus $10,000 for every inch measured in a straight line between any two points on the general's body; with the general getting to select any pair of points he wished.
The first man was an Air Force general. With all the following who wish to remain anonymous, this old bird accepted. He asked the pension man to measure from the top of his head to the tip of his toes. Six feet; he walked out with a check of $720,000.
The second man, an Army general, asked them to measure from the tip of his outstretched hands to his toes. Eight feet, he walked out with a check for $960,000.
When the third general: a grizzled old Marine was asked where to measure, he told the pension man: "From the tip of my Dick to the bottom of my Balls."
The pension man suggested that perhaps the Marine general might like to reconsider... pointing out the nice checks the previous two generals had received. The Marine insisted and the pension expert said that the medical officer would be doing the measuring.
The medical officer attended and asked the general to drop 'em. He did. The the doctor placed the tape on the tip of the general's schwantz and began to work back.
"My God!" he said. "Where are your testes?"
The general replied, "In Vietnam." Goest to show you...Everything that you do...will come back to you!
Good Luck Fargo!
Since it's been the dark ages that Fargo was in College, I feel that his pickup lines probably need some updating. After all, being in Virginia Beach and with all the yummies that he will be eyeballin', here's a list of lines and reasons not to use them. I keep notes on these things so that I don't make the same mistake twice. So from my little black book of what not to say, let him be forewarned:
Jason Everhardt: "Haven't we met before?"
Yummie: "Perhaps. I'm the receptionist at the VD Clinic."
Jason: "Haven't I seen you someplace before?"
Amber: "Yeah, that's why I don't go there any more."
Jason:"Is this seat empty?"
Tiffany: "Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down."
Jason: "So, wanna go back to my place?"
Christina: "Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?"
Jason: "Your place or mine?"
Trisha: "Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine."
Jason: "I'd like to call you. What's your number?"
Janie: "It's in the phone book."
Jason: "But I don't know your name."
Janie: "That's in the phone book too."
Jason: "So what do you do for a living?"
Lola: "I'm a female impersonator."
Jason: "Hey, baby, what's your sign?"
Ashley: "Do not enter."
Jason: "How do you like your eggs in the morning?"
Rebecca: "Unfertilized."
Jason: "Hey, come on, we're both in this bar for the same reason."
Ellen: "Yeah! Let's pick up some chicks!"
Jason: "I know how to please a woman."
Nina: "Then please leave me alone."
Jason: "I want to give myself to you."
Anna: "Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts."
Jason: "If I could see you naked, I'd die happy."
Leigh Ann: "yeah, but if I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing."
Jason: "Your body is like a temple."
Kim: "Sorry, there are no services today."
Jason: "I'd go through anything for you."
Buffy: "Good! Let's start with your bank account."
Break a Leg, Fargo Va (beach)... Remember, in life... it is all relative. What you see is what you get! And what get is what you deal. And what you deal is what you feel...so eat your beans at every meal!
Later!
He said, "Do you really want to know?"
She said, "Yes."
"I only wanted to suck your tits dry and fuck your brains out."
She said, "Well, what do you think today."
He said, "I think I did a good job.
They ran to him, cradled his blood-covered head and asked
him what had happened. "Well," he whispered, "I was
walking down this road, armed to the teeth. I came across
this heavily armed Iraqi border guard. I looked him right
in the eye and shouted, "Saddam Hussein is an unprincipled,
lying bastard!" He looked me right in the eye and shouted
back, "Bill Clinton is an unprincipled, lying bastard!"
"We were standing there shaking hands when the truck hit
us."